


the things we whisper in the dark

by quietuniverse



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Cuddling, Eddie trusts Buck, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Quiet admission of feelings, Soft Eddie, s03e03 coda
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-20
Updated: 2020-06-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:22:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,748
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24814522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quietuniverse/pseuds/quietuniverse
Summary: What if Eddie took Buck home with him the evening after the devastating tsunami? Christopher is worried Buck will be scared if he wakes up all alone, and Eddie just can't let that happen, can he?
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Comments: 23
Kudos: 436





	the things we whisper in the dark

When Buck finally wakes up, it takes him approximately five seconds to assess his surroundings and confirm that he is indeed, without a doubt, dead. He had clearly been swept away in the tsunami, and the events that followed—as he desperately searched for Christopher—were just a final cruel trick of his mind.

He comes to this conclusion as he finds himself in what he immediately recognizes as Eddie’s room, and more specifically...in Eddie’s bed. Wrapped up in his sheets and comforter. Wearing...his clothes? His body involuntarily shivers as he breathes in and realizes he’s enveloped in the man’s familiar, musky scent.

“Buck? Hey. You’re awake.”

Buck startles from his reverie at the sound of Eddie’s voice, and turns to find his best friend leaning against the bedroom’s doorway, a grin spreading across his face.

Buck yawns and stretches as he replies, “Ya know. I never really bought into this whole afterlife thing...but I guess **this** makes sense.”

Eddie raises an eyebrow and has to stifle a laugh as he walks over to him, choosing to casually ignore the way his stomach flips at the latter half of Buck’s sentence, and crouches down in front of him on the floor beside the bed. He gives Buck a firm look as he gently places a hand on his knee and matter-of-factly states, “You’re not dead, Buck.”

Buck contemplates this for a moment, face screwing up in confusion as he crashes back to reality. His heart begins to race as his mind catches up, and the words tumble from his mouth, “Wait...CHRISTOPHER! Where? He’s-... I’m-”

Eddie cuts him off in a soothing voice, “He’s sound asleep in bed, Buck. He’s okay. He’s fine.”

Buck looks like he wants to believe him, but his heaving chest and shaking hands say otherwise as a wave of emotion surges over him, threatening to sweep him away again like the unforgiving tides. Eddie surges upward without hesitation and Buck collapses into his arms; he can feel fresh tears soaking into his shirt as Buck buries his face against his collarbone. Eddie settles beside Buck on the bed, holding him tightly and gently rubbing small circles into his lower back until he stops shaking. After a few minutes of silence, Buck pulls back and turns to look at Eddie, eyes ringed red and cheeks still shining.

“Can I…?”

Eddie smiles. “Yeah.”

He helps Buck up, gently cupping one of his elbows as they cross the room, as the other man is still unsteady on his feet. Buck shuffles over to Christopher’s room, peering past the slightly ajar door to let his eyes take in the boy’s peacefully sleeping form. He stands there for a few moments, silent and listening to the soft sound of Christopher’s breathing, the quiet rhythm calming down his own racing heart.

Eddie stands a few paces away, leaning against the wall in the hallway with his arms crossed. He feels something warm and soft flutter in his chest as he watches a small smile spread across Buck’s face. The heavily etched lines of worry and exhaustion smooth out for just a moment, and Eddie feels like he can breathe again, too.

Buck coughs, quickly turning away from the doorway so as not to wake Christopher, and the spell is broken. He glances at Eddie as he remarks, “So uh, now that I’m no longer dead to the world, I’ll migrate to the couch,” and he makes his way toward the hallway closet, where spare pillows and blankets await.

Eddie quickly cuts him off, blocking his path to the closet, “Ah, I don’t think so man. You just had your entire ass kicked to hell and back by a tsunami, and you then proceeded to almost kill yourself on a rescue mission for my son. Your body took way more of a beating than mine did today, so I think the least that I can do is offer you my bed while I take the couch.”

Buck contemplates this for a moment, until another question begins to nag at the back of his mind. “Alright, I can’t argue there. But...I gotta ask. What’s wrong with _my_ bed?”

Eddie flushes, hands shoved in the pockets of his sweatpants as he leans back on his heels. “Well, Maddie wanted to come and get you from the field hospital. But the roads are a mess right now and Cap insisted that I just finish up for the night so I could take Christopher home. You were passed out cold by the time we got you in my truck, and Christopher started going on about how he was worried that you would be scared if you woke up alone. Hence...a surprise Diaz Buckley sleepover.”

Buck nods, thinking. He gives Eddie a small grin as he says, “Hope I didn’t drool in your truck.”

Eddie punches him lightly in the arm. “You better hope you don’t drool all over my pillows.”

Buck shrugs, "I'll do my best, but I'm not making any promises. And hey...did you...strip me down...?" He raises an eyebrow, giving Eddie a stern but playful look.

The older man sighs and rolls his eyes, "It's nothing I haven't seen before at the station, pal. You weren't getting into my bed in those disgusting clothes. I'm also still trying to figure out how you didn't wake up, I'm pretty sure I gagged when I finally peeled your musty, waterlogged pants off."

He earned a grin from Buck at that, who quipped, "If you wanted to get me out of my pants that badly you could have just asked."

Eddie chose to ignore the blood rushing in his ears and the way his heartbeat sped up at the suggestive statement. Instead, he sighed. "Thank you for today, Buck."

A whine comes from Christopher's room as he fusses in his sleep. The boy quiets down after a moment, but the sound sends a fresh wave of guilt coursing through Buck’s veins. He glances over at his best friend sadly. “Eddie, how can you even look me in the eye? Let me in your house? I lost your son.”

Eddie frowns, his face set in a hard line. “You saved him, Buck. Being a father isn’t about being perfect all the time, you’re going to make mistakes. Have you even met me? And things are going to happen that are out of your control, whether you like it or not.”

Buck looks down at his feet, speaking in a small voice, “Losing Christopher was the most terrifying, horrible feeling that I've ever experienced in my entire life, Eddie. I can still feel the echo of my heart pounding out of my chest. Look, do you even think it’s a good idea if he sees me here when he wakes up? He’s never going to trust me again. YOU’RE never going to trust me again.”

Eddie places a finger to Buck’s lips to shush him, lest he ramble himself any further into a hole of self depreciation. “Evan, there's nobody in this world I trust with my son more than you.”

And at that, Buck crumples.

Eddie is there to catch him though, easing him into his arms and whispering soft, soothing things into his ear in Spanish. Buck doesn’t understand what the words mean, but he melts into them anyway as he holds onto the other man for dear life. “Eddie…” he murmurs quietly, but he trails off, not sure what else to say. There’s too much, and he's not sure that he'll be able to stop once he starts. 

Eddie softly replies, speaking against the sensitive skin where Buck’s neck and shoulder meet, “I’m so glad that you’re alive, Buck. I’m unbelievably thankful that both you and Christopher are alive. I honestly don’t know what I would have done if I had lost either of you.”

He feels Buck shake slightly at that, feels damp tears falling down the other man’s cheeks. They stand like that for what feels like an eternity—too long, not long enough—until Buck finally pulls back. He gazes into Eddie’s eyes, an unreadable expression on his face, and says almost regretfully, “Well, I guess I should go hit the hay again. Before you change your mind about the whole bed offer.”

Eddie smiles and nods, bidding Buck goodnight quickly so as not to give himself the chance to act on one of the incredibly stupid ideas currently fighting for dominance in his mind.

...

Eddie's bright, glaring phone screen reads 3:47 AM when he rolls over to check it sometime later from the darkness of the living room, awoken by distressed noises coming from his bedroom. He’s up in seconds, crossing the perimeter of the bedroom to find Buck curled up into a ball in the middle of the bed. The younger man is shaking, crying, saying his name and Christopher’s name in between other unintelligible words—he’s having a nightmare. Eddie’s at war with himself, heart strings aching at Buck’s pained noises. _What if he doesn’t want this? Is this even the right time?_

Buck whimpers again, and Eddie’s resolve comes crashing down, splintered into pieces. It never stood a chance. He crawls into the bed, slipping under the warm covers, and wraps his arms around Buck. He nestles his face against Buck’s neck and whispers, “Corazón, you’re safe. You’re with me. You’re okay. Lo promento.”

Eddie can feel Buck’s heart rate begin to settle down, and his breathing evens out. He goes completely still for a moment, and Eddie holds his breath anxiously. Then he feels Buck scoot back closer against him, and he grabs one of Eddie’s hands and laces their fingers together, resting them against his chest.

It’s quiet for a beat, till Buck whispers, “Eddie.”

Eddie replies evenly, “Buck.”

“Is this okay?” Buck asks. It’s a loaded question, and there’s far more implication behind it than the fact that they’re cuddling in Eddie’s bed. It’s about all of the unspoken things they’ve both been too stubborn to admit, too afraid to act on. 

Eddie kisses the sensitive area under Buck’s earlobe, and he feels him shiver against him. Buck lifts their joined hands to his mouth and places a soft, lingering kiss against the skin between the other man’s thumb and pointer finger.

Eddie smiles in the dark, though he knows that Buck can’t see it.

“Yeah Buck, it is.”

He thinks he feels Buck smiling back.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Kudos and comments are very much appreciated and help motivate me to keep writing. I have much more still to come with these two.


End file.
